Living with Less, Embracing Memories: Reevaluating Materialism

In today’s world, material possessions often take centre stage in our lives. We find ourselves caught up in a constant pursuit of acquiring more and more. But amidst this materialistic frenzy, we often overlook the true essence of life: treasuring memories and experiences. In this quick blog, let us explore why we tend to be materialistic and discover the significance of living with less while cherishing meaningful moments.

The Materialistic Paradox:

Our society bombards us with advertisements and societal pressure to possess the latest, trendiest, and most expensive items. Materialism has become deeply ingrained in our culture, leading us to believe that accumulating more will bring us happiness and fulfilment. However, this pursuit often leaves us longing for more, trapped in a cycle of constant discontent.

The Illusion of Happiness:

While material possessions may provide temporary pleasure, they often fail to deliver lasting happiness. The initial excitement of owning something new fades away, and we find ourselves yearning for the next acquisition. Our desire for material goods can create a sense of dissatisfaction, as our happiness becomes dependent on external factors beyond our control.

Living with Less:

Living with less does not mean depriving ourselves of basic necessities or rejecting all material possessions. It means consciously evaluating our needs versus our wants and finding contentment in simplicity. By adopting a minimalist mindset, we can develop a deeper appreciation for the things we already have and focus on what truly matters in life.

The Power of Memories:

Memories are the fabric of our existence, woven with emotions, experiences, and connections. Unlike material possessions, memories cannot be bought or sold. They hold personal significance and provide us with a sense of purpose and identity. Shifting our focus from accumulating material goods to creating and cherishing memories allows us to recognise the richness of life and not of that in material abundance, but in the intangible moments we hold dear.

Embracing Mindful Consumption:

To break free from the grip of materialism, we must adopt a mindful approach to consumption. Before making a purchase, ask yourself if the item will truly enhance your life and contribute to your well-being. Instead of seeking instant gratification, invest in experiences that create lasting memories. Travel, spend quality time with loved ones, engage in hobbies, and explore the world around you. These moments become the true treasures that enrich your life.

So here’s to you:

Let’s challenge the prevailing materialistic mindset and embrace the abundance of memories instead. By shifting our focus from accumulating possessions to cherishing experiences, go out and find greater fulfilment and meaning. Living with less doesn’t mean sacrificing happiness; it means opening ourselves up to a world of possibilities where memories become the greatest treasures we possess.

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A Decade of Strength and Commitment – My Journey with Amy

Time has an extraordinary power to shape our lives, where we have moments that uplift us during the highs and provide solace during the lows. For the past ten years, I have been lucky enough to share an incredible time with my partner, Amy. Today, we celebrate our anniversary, reflecting on how we have grown stronger together and highlighting the unwavering support she provided me during difficult times, such as my mum’s battle with cancer.

A decade ago, Amy entered my life, where we met through a friend. As I stood there waiting for her to arrive, it was nerve wracking. But instantly, she had this easy-going attitude that instantly captured my attention. What began as a connection filled with laughs and sharing our life stories on first conversations, it soon blossomed into a profound and unbreakable bond over the coming years. The next few years, we have weathered storms together and celebrated life’s little adventures such as hot air ballooning, and many other fun things. But also, we’ve grown stronger as individuals too which I think is a major part of being with someone. If we have the ability to grow individually, we can come together stronger as a couple.

Amy has been my rock, has given me strength during the toughest moments life has thrown our way. Like last year, when my mum was diagnosed with cancer, the world felt like it was crumbling around me. Yet, in the face of such adversity, Amy stood by my side, offering unwavering support and understanding. She doesn’t know how much her support helped, even if she thought she didn’t have answers, it didn’t matter. She provided comfort during those dark and uncertain times.

Together, we have faced challenges of life head-on, navigating the uncharted territories that life has shown us. Amy’s presence brought a sense of calm amidst the chaos, her love and compassion a constant source of strength. She listened without judgment, offering a shoulder for me to literally cry on and a voice of encouragement when I didn’t see hope. Her belief in resilience helped me find the strength to carry on, even on the most challenging days while changing so much too, like my career change.

Through it all, our love grew stronger. I’ve learned the value of empathy, patience, and the power of being there for her when needed, just as she has done for me. Amy’s unwavering support taught me the true meaning of partnership, showing me that love can be a powerful force, capable of healing even the deepest wounds.

Beyond the challenges, our journey has been filled with incredible joy and growth though. One of my favourite memories with her is scuba-diving in Turkey where we got to hand feed a gaggle of fish (I’m not sure the term for a lot of fish, phaha), But she didn’t like the fish biting at her hand. A time where I remember wanting to laugh, but then remembering if I did, I’d accidentally drown by breathing in water!

Together, we have embraced life’s adventures. Amy’s presence has brought a sense of lightness and playfulness into my life, reminding me to cherish every moment and find joy in the simplest of things.

A decade of love and joy with Amy has shaped me in many ways. Through the highs and lows, her unwavering support has been a guiding light, particularly during the difficult times. Together, we have grown stronger, learning the power of resilience, empathy, and love.

As we move forward into the future, I am filled with gratitude for the love we share and the strength we’ve discovered within ourselves and as a couple. Our journey together has taught me that being there for one another during life’s toughest moments is the most precious gift we can offer.

Amy, thank you for being my rock, my light, and my partner in every sense of the word. Here’s to the next ten years of love, growth, and shared strength as we continue to navigate life’s joys and challenges together.

Here’s to you.

Censorship is here

Why has our current UK prime minister used taxpayer money going into making the vaccines, but we didn’t see any profits that THEY are currently making selfishly for themselves? We the people paid for it, but we haven’t seen any of the gains. What’s going on there?

The selling of vaccines made over 20 billion in profits. The NHS workers are striking and originally asked for a 19% pay rise. At this time of writing, inflation is at just over 10%, they were only REALLY asking for 9% to cover themselves. The billions in profit they made on rolling out vaccines means that it would give all NHS staffing the 19% wage increase they originally wanted for many years on end. Unfortunately it wouldn’t be profitable for the government who OWN the portfolio in the stock market shares of the vaccine companies to do so. That’s just ONE problem we have. I believe (at the time of writing) some hospital staff have agreed a 5% raise which is still an insult for those people who the same government clapped for in 2020.

They were also happy to cap extortionate bills that we pay, but what they should be doing is capping the companies making record profits from overselling/over pricing the basic necessities we need to go to our place of work and to do our jobs in order for us to pay the highest taxes where we don’t see where it’s actually going or even towards a good cause. The king’s coronation cost millions of pounds, yet there was a meme going round of a captured shot of potholes in British roads were filled in with SAND so that it wouldn’t hurt the wheels on the golden carriage. It’s ridiculous.

Something no one is talking about is the A.I. that they want to bring to this country. Tony Blair, an ex prime minister sat down and did a talk in front of people saying how he would like this country to adopt the digital passports for the ease of checking people in. Sounds great! But what you’ll actually be signing up to is the ability for them to use even more of the data about you as a human being, so they can sell you the health care you’ll need in the future when they fully privatise the NHS.

A.I. Is not for fun robot questions, where you ask it anything and it’ll tell you. Oh no. Instead, it will be used in every store, every bank and every street corner to watch what we are doing. Tracking your face and bringing up your digital passport where they know if you’ve just been to have your colonoscopy. Surveillance is everywhere, and it’s about to get much worse to the point where you won’t be allowed to have free choice other than following the new rules our government wants us to make rather than having the free will to do as we please.

A.i. in all new cars will reduce the speeds for us, which will have input from an outside source. They say it’s to save lives, but actually they’re trying to take away our freedom of choice which simply… is NOT good. Our own ability to do what we want in life is getting to be a thin sheet of ice that they’re making us walk on. But when will it break?

The prime minister was very big on the ideology around purchasing television channels such as Channel 4.

Well… we know what happened when Jeff Bezos bought the Washington Post, NOTHING bad has been said about its owner in that news source.

People are slowly twigging on to what’s NOT being said on the mainstream media which is a great thing to see, but the question is… How long will old policies and rules be around for if we make the simple decision to stop listening to what we’re being told by those who don’t see you as a real human being? We’re measly statistics on paper to these people. So why should we really care about helping their agenda by taking part in this political discourse?

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– Dean 

Stay humble

Being humble is something I’ve watched people not do. The further they got up the ladder to where they wanted to be, the more big headed they got. It’s been interesting to see those who have climbed high but have had a turn in life where they’re back at the bottom. But because they’ve returned to the bottom, all the people they pissed off along the way are now not willing to help them once again like they did the first time.

Over the past year or so, I myself have felt the pressures of returning where I was a few years ago, due to a job change, trying to pour more into my investing portfolio and also some unfortunate circumstances have happened, like my mum being diagnosed with cancer.

Over the past two years, I’ve made a choice to go back a few steps while I’m still young, and to go from this point to grow and progress properly. But because I’m now back playing in the dirt, I’m glad I stayed humble to those around me. This has paid off massively where people are willing to help me get to where I want to be. But not everyone does this because they don’t account for going two steps back. But life does this to you when you least expect it to.

The importance of treating people with kindness is so underrated. I know a guy, let us call him Greg for this sake, who bullies his way to get what he wants. Greg joined a mate working within a company where the boss hired him just because he was friends with the boss’s son. He then pushed his weight about, meaning he would make it look like he did the work when actually the two guys who stayed quiet would have put in their efforts for Greg to take the credit. This is a classic hierarchical system in the work place, which I learnt from Jordan Peterson when I did his online course. Apparently, only a small minority of workers actually do the work for any company, and the majority just mess about. Those who mess about, making it look like they do the work are the ones who get paid the most, and the workers who say nothing because they’re too busy working hard to get the job done get paid the least, even if they do most of the effort.

So from this, the two guys who put in the efforts handed in their notice after three years of tolerating Greg’s behaviour. Now Greg was left to his own devices where he was now having to do more work. Greg then suggests to the boss that it’s a struggle to get work done because of the lack of people due to those two people who left. So the two people who did the work that quit, were now replaced with 3 other younger more naive guys who got paid less.

It was interesting that the boss who was also losing interest in the company had faith in Greg, the person who didn’t do the work. The company now is running close to being in debt at the time of writing, and they struggle to keep it afloat, just making enough for payroll, but no profit. So Greg may even be pushed out of the job to where he’ll have to start all over again.

The two guys that left are now in places where they’re appreciated and get rewarded for their efforts, but if Greg were to approach either of them, my suspicions are that they aren’t going to be that helpful to Greg’s request of helping him out.

It’s interesting to see things play out in life. And to be kind to one another is super important. Without the kindness, you only end up shooting yourself in the foot for not doing what is a simple task of being a decent human being. Some people think it’s better to be more assertive, which is correct. But being assertive mixed with unpleasantness doesn’t get you far. You need to know where your limit is within your assertiveness and to be kind in the same process to where people gain a level of respect for where you need to be. I believe Gary Vaynerchuk (aka GaryVee) called it kind candour in his book “Twelve and a half”. Gary’s definition of kind candour (candor) is: The quality of being open and honest in expression; frankness.

It’s knowing when to have the ability to have authority but to have the ability to know you’re not speaking to a wall. You’re speaking to another human being who has feelings. That is the importance of empathy, and staying humble. Even if you have the ability to be where Greg is, if he treated the other employees with compassion, I think they would help him out when he will eventually need it, but the way that it’s going, I don’t see that happening.

I myself am glad to have the right people around me who want to see me win, and I think by learning the basics of being pleasant to other people will get you far.

Stay humble. It will get you further than anything else ever will.

If you enjoyed this blog post, make sure you check out my YouTube channel too, so you can see videos of this sort of content too! Cheers 

Bad energy dampens your optimism

I remember someone once saying to me, “How can you be positive 24/7?” And what they really meant was when I referenced staying optimistic 24/7. Positivity and optimism aren’t the same thing. Being positive all the time just isn’t possible. I bet the Dalai Lama even has his off days.

But staying optimistic is totally different. You can be optimistic, even when you feel pissed off. You can stay open minded, even if you’re angry. You can be ready to sort a problem, even when you’ve just been given terrible news.

I got a text from my mum one afternoon whilst at work last year, around February. She said if I could just pop round after work, seeing as I go past my parents house on the way home anyway. I replied “Not a problem, see you later”. I thought that she might of had a delivery for me, as I had moved house a few years ago but sometimes my parcels still go there due to my pure laziness of not changing my address on certain websites. When I arrived there, my brother’s vehicle was also there. This was unusual, as it looked like he got the same message. Then I wondered why. In an instant parking up my vehicle, my brain goes into pondering what it could be that we’re both needing to be here.

I walk down the driveway, and my dad smiles sheepishly at me from the kitchen window. I nod to him, and then walked towards the door. I open it up and walk into the kitchen where my brother is sat on the stool, arms crossed in anticipation for my arrival so we could find out why we were called here. He looks to me as I sit down, and dad offers to make us a cup of tea. This isn’t usually the case. Mum would always make a cup of tea when we get there. Mum is standing there bracing herself for what came next. Then she told us both.

“Hello. You’re probably wondering why you’re both here. Well… I sent you both the same text, as I knew you’d both be in the area on this day”

My brother asked “So why are we both here then?”

There was a short pause. Then she tells us.

“I found a lump. I got it checked out, and…… it’s not good news.” Me and my brother look to each other then back to her. “I’ve got breast cancer”.

She bursts into tears at the final relief of telling someone for the first time. And then it hit us both. I leapt out of the stool, and my brother froze. I hug her as tight as I can, and tell her shes not alone and I say to her it’s going to be fine. My dad, in the corner didn’t know what to do with himself. He had been going through this with her for two weeks before finding out the result that day, so he was also in a state. I let go of mum and went over, instantly hugged him and told him “It’s okay, whatever you need from here, I’m here and you’re not alone.”

At this point, it then hit what I was just told. I burst into tears and stared out the window, just ten minutes previous to where dad was staring. My optimism kicked in to be there to comfort and support the two people who have been dealing with it. My brother still sat, crying with disbelief of the news. After he gathered his thoughts, he hugged them both too. My brain put them first before it chose to look after me first. And that, is what I believe to be what true optimism is. In one of the worst moments I’ve been in, that is when I proved to myself how optimistic I’ve been able to train my brain. For the next three days, I was bursting into tears, and randomly breaking down without control of my thoughts. But only for three days. I strongly backed this up, as in three days of losing myself and not being able to think straight, I was able to then focus on how to go from this moment forward. I would feel sad in moments, but I felt so drained from emotion that I stopped crying. My tears had just stopped coming and my brain thought about the possibilities of getting her better. Then we made a plan on when I would take mum to the hospital in between dad doing it, as his job wasn’t as flexible as mine at that time. My other brother, the eldest, and my sister had been told and dealt with it in their own ways, which I wasn’t happy about. My sister was a worrier, which made mum comfort HER about it. IT should be the other way round! And well… My eldest brother ignored the fact his mum had been diagnosed with cancer. Through the whole process, he went to see her once in three months. Personally, I think it’s disgusting how someone couldn’t be there for their own mum just to put their selfish needs of not wanting the bad vibes for his own personal well being. Even if you don’t know what to say or do, you show them you’re there, even if you don’t want to be. It’s not nice having to deal with something alone. But each to their own of how you deal with things.

We didn’t know if we needed to pay for treatment, so dad wanted to work as much as he could so he could pay for it if needed. It looked possible, but thankfully that wasn’t the case, and at the time of writing this, mum has had it cut out and has been clear for a year.

Once it was removed and she was all clear, my eldest brother went to see her, 6 months down the line from being told. Not cool… But what can you do? Some people just aren’t good at handling problems. But YOU can be.

Optimism doesn’t mean being positive and smiling each day. Optimism is dependent on what you are able to do when you least expect a problem to occur. Optimism is something that drives you to make better decisions instead of overthinking the worst outcome of what will probably never happen.

Lets put it into another perspective:

If you go to a party, but aren’t willing to be there, then you’re going to give out bad energy. If you’re trying to look at a property that you want to buy, but you’re not in the right mood to go look at it because you’ve got something else on your mind, then you’ll eject more bad energy and might put off an opportunity. There’s no good for you to be at that location at that time if you’re not in the correct frame of mind to do what you’re going to do there. So why would you be putting yourself through negativity?

Positivity isn’t going to cut it. You need to be driven with the optimistic outlook in those particular moments, as it affects how you think. This could make you do a bad deal, or do something you may regret, just because you aren’t in that frame of mind. So don’t make decisions based on that current time. Go away from that party, or leave that deal for another day, because when you return to it thinking clearly, you’ll be at your best to give your utmost attention, which will make you put your best cards down on the table.

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What media do you consume?

The more I’ve been thinking about it, the more I can’t seem to unsee it. The media we as individuals see on a daily basis is how we base our opinions, our thoughts, and our ideas to what we consume.

But it only crossed my mind not too long ago how one sided the media is. No matter what news source you get your information from, they all have an agenda to sell us the ideologies of whatever the person who runs the news channels WANTS us to see or hear.

We consume the ideas pushed normally by one sided arguments to get us (the public) to agree with one side and that is usually the one that wins within an upcoming election, or maybe its towards a vote on who is next in power. The idea of pushing a popular idiot into power is put to us in a long formed propaganda, to where we end up doing exactly what we’re told to do and sometimes we don’t even know it!

It takes just one look back at the timeline of past presidents (or here in the UK, prime ministers) who are favourably unpopular, but even those who don’t watch or listen to the news will vote for that person who is most heard of, and they don’t base it off of the agreements of policy they are actually pushing.

It was in a recent podcast I was listening to, where the presenter said to become aware of how the news is presented to us.

What language do they use? What points do they emphasise on? What adjectives do they use? What do they place on the news to where things seem normal around certain agendas? Like for example, they feature heavily the army equipment in recent stories to get us used to the idea that it’s “okay” and “normal” for there to be army helicopters flying over head every time we just want to nip out the house to get a pint of milk. They want to normalise the scenes of political power doing things wrong and people accepting that those people won’t be punished for doing something terrible. They normalise the things that seem crazy so we don’t question it. But my question to you is…. Why? Why are they doing it?

If they keep us emerged in the glossed over picture that they paint, then we accept anything. This is not how democracy works. We are losing who we once were as free people in charge of our own decisions, but now bigger power has shifted to where only a few people in the world run the majority of decisions, which isn’t good for anyone.

Be open minded to why we don’t see both sides of an argument on the news. Be wise to the idea that they WANT to push their thoughts onto you, so it benefits those in power. Be mindful of the language they use, and see if you can figure out the real message they’re pushing.

Because from what I can see, it isn’t a good one.

Is it a happy Valentines day? David Bowie didn’t think so

It’s Valentine’s day! (at this time of posting!) A day where those share gifts of appreciation to their partners. A day where people cook meals with love and share gratitude for each other. Others… Really aren’t bothered about it and think it’s a con. A day simply made up by card companies so they could sell us this nonsense.

But also, this day is remembered for another reason. This was a day that shares the title with a David Bowie track. It’s called, you guessed it… Valentine’s Day. However, this isn’t a song around love or cringe worthy similes which represent the bond of those who share their lives together. In fact, it’s got nothing to do with what we see as Valentines day.

David Bowie was a very smart man. His style of writing and composing music was second to none. David’s political beliefs were based around what should be done to improve mankind. You can hear him in different interviews, different clips and even in his music videos where he makes statements based around disagreements of politics. You can see this for example in his video for Bowie’s classic song “Let’s Dance”. This is one of my many favourite songs which was filmed in Australia that centred on a young Aboriginal couple.

Bowie called the video “a direct statement on integration,” and it included references to domestic slavery, 1950’s British nuclear testing and the stolen generation of Aboriginal children who were taken away from their families.

He’s also raised money for Live Aid with Mick Jagger in” Dancing in the street”. Something of which became very big back in the day.

David also made one of the most poetic justices with his famous song Heroes. His lyrics in the song tell the German government how wrong they were for not tearing down the Berlin Wall. That is also what helped it get pulled down, which I have already talked about in a video, which you can find here!

So what was his message around Valentine’s day? It’s ACTUALLY based around the psychology of what was going through a school shooter’s mindset where a madman ran a riot at the Northern Illinois University back in 2008 on the 14th of February. Steven (kas-em-ear-zak) Kazmierczak opened fire into a room of 120 people. He sadly killed five students and injured 17 other people before he turned the gun on himself.

So the co-producer of the song with Bowie was Toni Visconti. Toni told “The London Times” how “the issue for Bowie isn’t so much guns but the mental health of the shooter”.

When we look at David’s music video for the song, we see him straight away use shadowy scenes in an abandoned building where he mimics the real life movements of the shooter, Steven, who he refers to as Valentine. His positioning of the Hohner Gt2 guitar is small enough where his shadowy presents in the building is eerily like a gun. David Bowie holds up the small guitar in his hand the way “Valentine” did after he shot down some of the students. His first line is “Valentine told me who’s to go” saying that the voices in Steven’s head were directing him to whose life should have been taken. The look that Bowie gives to the camera as it pans round to him where it feels like his portrayal of the killer is looking into your soul.

Around 1 minute 16 seconds into the video, Bowie traipses around with a stiff back, walking from side to side dragging the “weapon”. This gives a sense of disturbance and that Valentine was looking for his next victim.

Bowie paints a picture of the weapon in hand but he didn’t want to use any props as such for the representation of it. So he mimes this with hand movements and the use of his small guitar.

2 minutes 28 seconds in, keep your eyes peeled for the strum of the guitar where the camera picks up the vibration through the guitar strings which look like a bullet shooting across the screen.

Nearing the end of the video you see Bowie out of breath, again holding up the “weapon” of which we see represents that Valentine has done what he came here for.

David Bowie’s tone throughout this video has a strong persona. It shows us the mental capacity of which we see a small insight into the unstable mindset that some have which leads to the terrible tragedies that happen more and more regularly which to be fair, is frightening.

The thoughts around what meant most to Bowie were provoking a thought into what we can do today to make a change in our societal norms. What can we do to make the world a better place? How can we help those who feel this way before they’re left to their own senses to do something as terrible as what happened back in 2008?

It really makes you wonder how as humans we can keep progressing towards a better future instead of turning a blind eye to the issues until they play a whole new narrative in our everyday lives.

So ask yourself right now…. What can WE do to make this world a better place?

Thanks for reading.

“Valentines Day” – David Bowie on YouTube

How important really is accountability?

This year I have set myself the target to be more creative. I used to write a lot of my thoughts down and share them in blog posts, or over on YouTube in video format, but over the past couple of years, I have quietly sat back from writing down my thoughts as much. (Sorry for not posting as often as I used to!)

There has been no real reason for this, but I don’t want to lose this quality that I see in myself to be able to write a good piece and to share it. I don’t want to lose my ability to share thoughts on camera for others to see. I’m concerned about the world we live in may be becoming less and less creative, but with more demand on things just happening for us. For example, kids flicking through social media where they’re getting an instant dopamine hit through the content they watch. Late teens tapping a few buttons for a pizza delivery firm to bring them their dinner in minutes. Early adult life of ordering something online and expecting the item to be there within less than 12 to 18 hours. It’s a world gone crazy for instantaneous lifestyle. 

So when it comes to fixing our mindset from where we are now to where we want to be in a few years time, the traction just isn’t as quick. Self development is a slower process. I mean, I speak from experience of how it took me over 4 years to get into a more positive frame of mind. Not exactly the same time frame that it is to order from your phone, hey?

But now I see a generation of more people who just can’t be bothered to take the time to sort out their life. They would rather sit on their phone and complain about how bad their day has been online. They type out 160 characters and press that button. Many people like to watch their phone to see how much interaction that post will get, rather than using that time to solve the actual problem they’re complaining about!

So this leads me to the thought of accountability. How can we personally take this accountability to be able to work on ourselves during a time where the world feels like it’s whizzing past us at a hundred miles per hour? We need to pause for thought. To stop ourselves in the moment. To open our eyes and to do something that will get our own attention, so we pull ourselves out of this haze in life. We walk around not knowing what we’re doing, only to then see that we are stuck in a routine. And maybe this routine isn’t good for you. 

Pause now, and become aware of what’s around you. If you’re reading this on your phone, look up. Are you outside? Look at the sky. Are you inside your bedroom? Look out the window. Are you walking? Don’t read and walk, that’s just a disaster waiting to happen. Do something right this second to pull yourself out of your busy day. You then give yourself this chance to actually become aware of what’s happening around you. Now you’re paused at this moment, think right now this question: “Am I accountable for the life I am living?” Ask yourself, “Are you really doing everything in your power to be a better person and to become the best person to the best of your ability?” These are a few things to draw your attention to.

When you do this, you have to answer it with a real answer of either, “yes, I am doing those things” or “no, I’m not following through to take myself to the best path in life”. 

This is accountability. To become accountable for the life you lead, you must see where you are from this point forward. If you’re not where you need to be, maybe you could benefit from working on your own thoughts and mind processes. If you’re on track to getting the things you want in life, ask yourself “Are these things really an idea that I have for myself, or has someone subconsciously gave me this perception of wanting these things in life?” AHA! Another turn on the road-map you never planned for. I had to get you somehow! 

Now whatever it is you’re asking yourself, it’s time to become accountable for the actions you take from this moment. This wasn’t a plan of how to get you through your life. This was a blog post that I thought would help question something inside your mind, and to throw a spanner in the works which I hope you can now use to becoming better at something a long the way of your journey. 

Bear in mind that although the world moves fast, self development and self care takes time to see real change and authentic growth into becoming the person you were destined to be. But maybe that wouldn’t have happened had I not of questioned you through this creative piece of writing. At least I have been accountable for writing this. Now it’s your turn to have the accountability for changing your journey, whatever it may be. 

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Catch me over on YouTube where I have been sharing my thoughts in videos too! See you over there. Cheers 

“A Little Happier” by Derren Brown BOOK REVIEW!

I don’t usually do written book reviews, but this one I felt was one that needed one to help me get the full points across and to explain why I chose this as one of my books that everyone should read to help you through life. So here we go! A little happier, by Derren Brown, my book review:

Here, I am about to go over the main points in the chapters of this smaller version of his original book, “Happy”, which goes more in depth with each individual point made. But this one is for those wanting to get the point of it, with a lot less reading. And I hope this will make people want to pick up both “Happy” and “A Little Happier”. So, the first chapter basically explains how we tell ourselves the story of believing OUR side of a story that has maybe happened to us, but we fill in the blanks from the other side. In this, Derren explains why we should be more open to listening to others as well, so we don’t just assume the things we miss, as we are bound to be biased to our own views. It starts off by questioning happiness, and why people aim for it as if we don’t already have possession of what we perceive as happiness.

Chapter two basically states that most self help books are a lie, and we are told to believe in our self with little or no context to whether this is right for us. This was a point that I both agree and disagree. Self help books gave me a place to turn when I wasn’t at my best many years ago. But I totally understand his point of some of those books where there is no reassurance for change. It’s like books that say to believe in yourself, but when you don’t believe in yourself, you blame your own belief system for not being stronger because that is what these books sell to us. Derren explains that the belief is the same as those who sell empty promises like fortune tellers or faith healers who tell you to chuck the medicines away and to just rely on belief.

Derren is a very clever man. He understands that autobiographies of the best people in the world who focus on one thing in life is not good for us. However, I think an autobiography can help our perspective to see what others have done, to then be inspired to make our own journey through life. Like that of Richard Branson’s autobiography can help us believe that good things can happen, but have the perspective that you probably won’t be a billionaire.

In school, we’re told to pick subjects for certain areas where we may like to go into a working place, to then focus on getting higher education doing those things you were forced to pick when you were merely a child. So not to focus on long term goals but just short term goals as we can’t predict the future and nor should we try to, which I thought was a very good point.

Chapter three he goes into detail about how planning our life can be based on fortunes that we can not control which is when a curve ball may be thrown at you that sets aside this “dream life” you have. In personal experience, I had this happen. My mum was diagnosed with cancer. I was not prepared for it, but my stoic ability to be able to keep going on being strong for my family meant that I handled a problem without stopping to feel sorry for myself. What Derren goes on to say is that Freud looked at returning the notion of “natural unhappiness” to people of optimism, so they would be brought back down to reality in order for them to handle life as it comes without being to focused on their dreams that will eventually let them down when they don’t get them.

I’m right behind that to a certain extent. Although I got myself out of a mentally rough place with self help books many years ago, I totally understand what Derren means when we should live without this nonsense life goal of what you want life to be like. That shouldn’t deter anyone away from chasing their dreams, but if life has this non controllable curve ball, you need to be in charge of grabbing the bull by the horns, getting through a rough time and pick up where you left off without thinking that you’ll never end up with the life you want, but life is teaching you how to be strong in a specific area which you can get adversity and strength from in the realism’s of life.

Continuing in the book, he speaks of our own judgements being awful in a world where information we are told is that we are small in a big world, therefore not only do we limit ourselves, but that any chance of getting out of the system in hard. Maybe we don’t try at all. He quotes Carl Jung, the most famous of all psychologists who once said “The greatest burden a child has to bear is the unlived life of its parents”.

Our vision is warped. Derren talks about how we deal with life. If we are a victim to what happens but we know someone who reacts different to these situations, then we know not to trust our judgement on how we handle it, but to learn about how we CAN deal with it better. Lose the victim mentality.

In following chapters, he gives the analogy from Philosopher, Robert Nozick of being led in a bed with a computer linked to our brain which gives the sense of happy places or any experience you liked for the rest of your life. Derren goes on to say that most wouldn’t link up to this because we want more than an ongoing mood or experience… But we want meaning instead of a feeling.

Here are a few more quicker points that I noted but don’t need too much in depth analysis:

– Derren says the first stoics were from the East which is why ideas of non attachments are seen in Greek teachings and Buddhism.

– He says the things outside our control are fine.

– Derren references Brian Cranston saying it’s not your job to get the job, but focusing on your talent and energy, but if it goes to someone else, then great, it was theirs. (I will review his book soon over on my YouTube channel)

– Lower your expectations. His example was when you’re trying to tell someone about bad service, and they say they’ll put a note on your account. But no one says it will reach anyone who would sort the problem. So don’t expect too much from anyone.

– We think over and over about worries but don’t do that until the things actually happen

An interesting thought Derren talks about near the end of this book is around the idea of loss. When we imagine losing someone we love may cause some anxiety, this practice is something that I already do. He’s the only other person other than Gary Vaynerchuk to do this as a mental practice, but I have to say, it prepped me for worst outcomes and gave me a chance to imagine what would happen without those people there in my life. Also, it’s to help with gratitude for the things we take for granted. Not everyone wants to do this, but I would definitely recommend it. And he says to do this with your basics like leaving your phone away from your person for the day.

He finishes the book by summing up our anxieties not being who we are. We are not our feelings. We are the byproduct of everything life teaches us and not to be put off by this one feeling that let’s us experience more “what ifs” to every scenario life throws at us.

Such a brilliant little book, but if you want the full in depth version, go grab “Happy” which will keep you more informed than this one does, however, you will certainly learn a lot, even if it is the basics of how we should be going through life.

I absolutely loved it. It’s a 5 out of 5 from me.

If you want more book reviews, I do them in video format, where you can subscribe to my YouTube channel here! Thanks for reading.

Ken Block was THE best of the best

The sad news hit our ears this week when Ken Block, one of the best drivers of our times in Motorsport history passed away in a tragic accident, but to many people’s surprise, not in a car.

Ken Block has done so much in his lifetime, which I could put side by side with a video game. His driving skills broke the laws of physics, where he would throw a car around like we do on the PlayStation. His talents were mind blowing. From jumping his vehicles up to 25ft in the air, all the way to drifting on the edge of a large drop into the sea, he has done it all.

Here’s a couple photos of myself drifting.  He inspired me to give it a go too.

He was an inspiration for me, where he stated in an interview once, that “if you’re not scared, you’re not going fast enough”. He was also asked where his legacy will lead him, and his response was brilliant. He said “I try to inspire people to be creative and live a fun life. Oh, and don’t be an asshole”.

His words, yet light hearted at the time now make sense of his purpose. He fulfilled it. Unfortunately, he has been taken early, but at the cost of truly living.

I remember Ricky Gervais once saying “they say if you don’t drink and smoke you live ten years longer….BUT, they’re the worst years” which is a very valid point. Who wants to get to their 100’s if all you do is survive? At what point do you decide to never go on an adventure again? When do you sit down and think “I’m going to say or do nothing that will move me forward from this point on, as long as I can live longer” – No one ever regrets the things they’ve done as much as the people who regret NOT doing the things they never did at all.

If you get to your mid 50’s knowing you lived everyday with full intention, with the practicality of not missing a day where you spent it smiling, and enjoying every moment of every hour, then that would have been enough.

If you get to your 100th birthday hoping to get a piece of folded card signed by the King, but you didn’t enjoy your everyday life getting their for the price of not doing the things you enjoyed, then it’s time to question your choices today, before you even reach that point.

It is not death that we should fear, but not beginning to truly live, to enjoy our surroundings, to take those trips, to create those memories, and to have a bloody good laugh in the process. That is what life is for, and Ken Block has a documented journey of all the smiles and laughs that he’s had doing it. For that, I raised a can of Monster Energy (a brand that he gave a good reputation to) to him this week.

Now here’s to you. Make a decision today that will benefit your tomorrows.